Getting Started and a Surprise – October 7, 2021
In early October 2021, Fair Oaks Presbyterian Church, as recommended by the Mission Committee, began working with Grace Lutheran Church to sponsor a refugee family through Refugee One (refugeeone.org). The expectation was that we would have several months to prepare for the arrival of the family that would be assigned to us. The turmoil in Afghanistan and the rushed evacuation of so many men, women and children led to many changes in plans. So twelve days after Fair Oaks and Grace launched our partnership, we received notice that our assigned family – a recently widowed woman with six children from Afghanistan – would be arriving in Chicago in six days.
Preparing for the Family’s Arrival – October 19-24, 2021
With six days’ notice of the family’s arrival, teams of volunteers from Grace and Fair Oaks got to work. Refugee One found two apartments for the family. (Two apartments were needed because two older sons of the family, separated from the family during the evacuation, were reunited.) The teams purchased and washed linens for nine, moved donated furniture into the apartment, scrubbed floors kitchens, and bathrooms, supplied the kitchen with utensils, dishes and cookware, and shopped for appropriate food to stock the refrigerator and pantry. Late afternoon Sunday before the family’s arrival Monday, the apartments were ready.
Family Arrives – October 25, 2021
On Monday, October 25, the family arrived by bus. A welcome group from our congregations and Refugee One met the family, along with a host of relatives who previously settled in Chicago. It was a joyful reunion and a huge sigh of relief that the family was now safe and reunited. The welcome group and extended family drove the new family to their apartments and helped carry in the few possessions they brought. It was a day of celebration and relief.
First Visit – October 29, 2021
On October 29, four team leaders visited the family for the first time in their apartments. We found the family – mother and 8 children – surrounded with love and support from uncles, aunts and cousins, some of whom have been in the US for several years. The apartments had been reorganized by the family to best meet their needs. We reviewed preferred foods, immediate needs, questions. It was a time for the team leaders and the family to begin the process of learning about and from each other. We left feeling excited and hopeful for the family, and grateful for the opportunity to journey with them.
Next Steps – November 1-5, 2021
Now is the time to do all the work that would ordinarily be done before a family’s arrival. A Core Team (as Refugee One names it) has been formed, a small subset of the many, many volunteers from both congregations who helped with preparing for the family’s arrival. This Core Team, which has been vetted and trained by Refugee One, will maintain regular contact with the family, serving as a “good neighbor and friend” to ease the family’s transition into this new culture, language, and life. The Core Team also coordinates with Refugee One, who manages the legal, governmental, and medical services the family will receive. The Core Team also keeps the congregation apprised of all that is happening with the family and draws on congregation volunteers to help with specific tasks or needs.
Visit with Family – November 6, 2021
The visit to the Afghan refugee family on November 6 was a delight. The little girls loved the new markers and paper and immediately began drawing. The oldest son cooked a delicious Afghan dish for us. To get sizes for clothing, we made a game of measuring everyone’s height. – drawing pencil marks on the door frame. The used cell phone we brought was gratefully received. The younger sons who speak some English are full of helpfulness and gratitude.
As the family settles into their life in Chicago, they are realizing that some things are necessities here – like winter coats and boots! To meet this important need, Fair Oaks is having a Clothing Drive in the next week to collect warm clothing for Mom and her eight children. For information about how you can help, email the office (office@fairoakspres.org).
Prepared for Winter – November 20, 2021
The Afghan refugee family we are co-sponsoring is now prepared for their first Chicago winter! Thanks to the generosity and hard work from so many faithful Fair Oaks members, every family member now has a warm winter coat, boots, gloves, hat and scarf. Plus, sweaters and sweatshirts and socks. The happiness and excitement in the room when we delivered the big bags of clothing was a joy.
Many thanks to everyone in our Fair Oaks community for your continuing support and work and prayers to help this widowed mom and her eight children as they settle into their new lives.
Update – December 17, 2021
There is much good news to share about the Afghan refugee family Fair Oaks is co-sponsoring with Grace Lutheran. The three boys, ages 9-17, are all enrolled in school and two have started. The two oldest boys, ages 19 and 24, have jobs in their neighborhood, both working in grocery stores. Through the generosity of Fair Oaks, the family has two cell phones (for which they pay the monthly fees), the boys begin their schooling well-equipped with supplies, and everyone in their family has a warm coat, boots, gloves, hats, and sweaters. It is all remarkable, given that the family has been in Chicago less than 2 months.
Our Core Team is constantly amazed at the family’s resilience in the face of so much sadness and loss, and their open-hearted kindness toward us and toward each other. Our team is overwhelmed and grateful for the generosity of Fair Oaks and Grace in meeting the needs of this family. Thank you, Fair Oaks!
Celebrating the Season of Gifts – December 30, 2021
Members of the Refugee Team from Fair Oaks and Grace celebrated this season of giving with the mother and her children with a lovely visit. While the Team members enjoyed Afghan sweets, dates and nuts, the whole family opened gifts carefully selected for each person. There were educational toys for the young girls, warm clothing for the mother, as well as both needed and fun items for the boys, such as a watch for one and a soccer ball for another. One son received an early gift of a bicycle, which he needed to get to school and to run simple errands for the family. Mindful of the family’s Muslim faith, we focused on sharing, hospitality and welcome, as we welcome the family to America and as they welcome us into their home and lives.
Thank you to everyone at Fair Oaks who has been part of this journey and has shared so generously. The needs of this family continue to change as they experience expected and unexpected changes – from preparing for a Chicago winter to health concerns. We are grateful for the family’s resilience and eagerness to enter their new lives in this new country, and we are grateful for all the love and support from the Fair Oaks and Grace communities.
Winter in Chicago – February 3, 2022
The Afghan family continues to learn and adapt to their new lives, and we continue to learn more about their culture and their hopes for the future. All three boys, ages 10-19, are now in school, learning English – language and literature – as well as math and computer skills. Every day there is procession of cousins and aunts who accompany the family’s two younger boys to school. Mom is home with the three little girls (ages 1-5), spending time with her sisters and sisters-in-law, all of whom live within walking distance.
We are learning that the transition to a new life is not a straight line. Relief and gratitude for being safe and surrounded by family mingles with homesickness and sadness for what has been lost. Our role has been to serve as friends, providing what we can in terms of material needs, information, and welcome. We have been warmly received by the family. With thanks to all the generous people at Fair Oaks who have helped, we continue with the family on the journey into their new life.
Learning to Live in a New Country – March 14, 2022
The family continues with determination and courage to adapt to their new life. The oldest son is now working part-time to support the family while also attending community college. The two younger boys are doing well in school. The mother is at home with the three delightful little girls. The family’s transition into this new world of America has not been without barriers and bumps, including health concerns, adjustment in expectations for school and work situations, and limited financial resources. All are being addressed with solutions which focus on building skills and finding resources that foster independence.
Our Core Team is deeply appreciative and respectful of the family’s resilience in the face of so much loss. Their loving concern for each other is a joy to see. We have been welcomed graciously into their lives and onto their path to a new life. Thank you to Fair Oaks for continuing to help meet the evolving needs of this family.
Update and Transition – June 27, 2022
The Afghan refugee family we sponsor is doing well. Their apartment now has air conditioners and curtains to help with this heat – they tell us it is rarely this hot in Afghanistan! The younger boys (ages 16 and 11) have finished the school year and happily report that they did well. The oldest boy (age 19) is working part-time to support the family and is studying part-time at community college. Four of the six children now have bicycles, including most recently the 6-year-old daughter. All three little girls (ages 1, 4, 6) are a smiling welcome committee for every visit. The mother is the mainstay of this loving, hard-working family since her husband’s death less than a year ago. They are fortunate to have a large extended family in the immediate area – six of the mother’s siblings and their children are all close by and fully engaged in helping each other.
Our formal six-month commitment to sponsor the Afghan refugee family through Refugee One has come to an end. The family faces many challenges, especially financial. Our Core Team, both Fair Oaks and Grace members, has chosen to stay connected and involved this family. Our relationship will be less structured, with fewer visits and more focus on specific needs identified by the family. We see ourselves as friends to the family, enjoying time together and sharing experiences, also being available for new concerns. The Mission Committees of Fair Oaks and of Grace will continue to be a resource and Refugee One will remain available for support and assistance as needed.
The generosity and kindness with which the entire Fair Oaks congregation has welcomed the family has been wonderful. Every request for clothing, household items, phones, toys, books, bicycles, school supplies, food, and volunteer work has been met with an overwhelming response. People often reach out to one of us on the Core Team to inquire about the family and how they are doing. Just as the Core Team is staying involved, we trust that your interest and willingness to help will continue. You can expect to continue to hear updates and as always, feel free to contact us with questions.
Thank you, Fair Oaks!